written by Therapist Jessica Watson.
We all know that if we eat well, we feel better, but how much attention do we pay to the other things we consume daily, and how it makes us feel? Are we consuming mindfully or nourishing ourselves in the precious minutes we have available?
Since spending so much time alone, I am now more aware of how I feel in other people’s company. There are the people that energise and inspire and those that feel heavy to be around. It has nothing to do with moods, as people who have the same frequency as us, still manage to give that across even when feeling less than the best version of themselves. Its about the perspective energising people have on the world which can either be wildly different from ours or spookily similar. As an introvert I find the company of extroverts exciting but can also feel a little overwhelmed, when I click with someone, I find I can be just as outgoing and open in a way that feels safe.
We all know that if we eat well, we feel better, but how much attention do we pay to the other things we consume daily, and how it makes us feel?
Feeling safe stems from our childhood and we are often drawn to the familiar which in the case of dysfunctional childhoods isn’t so helpful as an adult. Family is the one area a lot of my clients feel difficult talking about but are the one area we find problematic patterns of interaction that can be changed and addressed. We are conditioned by society to honour our parents and not to be ‘disloyal’, or to love our children unconditionally, but sometimes we may not like them very much. As a therapist I ensure my clients know that there is no gain to be had from assigning blame to anyone, but in understanding the genetic chain we belong to, we can make sense of our own feelings towards the outside world. Understanding our place in a bigger picture can help us progress independently, gaining perspective of our own lives through therapy can help with that process.
Safety for all of us is high on our personal agendas and for those that had past traumas or difficult childhoods, the pandemic has created an even heightened state of hypervigilance. Feeling safe has become a priority for most and there has been a palpable shift towards ‘nesting’ and staying within our comfort zones.
Growing emotionally means we must push ourselves to feel uncomfortable and experience the ‘unknown’ as it exposes us to new experiences that break unhealthy ‘familiar’ behavioural patterns.
Becoming aware of the way we feel after engaging with the news, social media, what films we watch, or the people in our lives, can give us a perspective on where we need to make changes. Just as noticing how we feel after eating sugary foods or a plate of vegetables, it’s important to take care of our emotional diet and nutrition. Lessen the time spent in the company of people that drain energy and move towards activities and people that bring our new sides to us and push us to experience new feelings. Its not an easy process like most things that are worth anything in life but the rewards are great.
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